Identity is a social construct
There are times when we are angry or confused with ourselves and thinking out loud,
“What did I do to get stuck in this rut?
Why can’t my girlfriend see me for who I am?
Why do I let my boss pick on me?”
Have you ever thought that the present you are the indirect result of the many circumstances that contributed to your decision?
“The main reason why we judge others is because we have yet to form a relationship with ourselves.” — Ralph Smart
You are not your identity
Identity is a social perception, a man-made construct.
For example, you have been taught to believe that you are good ol’ Tom, always nice and staying out of the way. Or Jessie, the gypsy girl who is always seen at a corner and never talk to anyone (no offense to all the Jessies and Toms).
In other words, you soak all this information like a sponge and adopt it as your identity, which is an outcome of society’s manifestation on how you should be.
And whenever it comes to thinking about our identity, it can never end. We become vexed, anxious and fearful when we have the constant need to measure up according to society’s standard.
That explains when we don't feel in line with our deepest purpose when we accept this constructed “persona” as a true representation of our self.
You are a unique piece of a puzzle
I believe in a wholesome view that we are just a tiny piece of the jigsaw that makes up the grand scheme of things. To deviate from this natural order is futile, as every piece is unique and it connects to another perfectly to contribute to a larger whole.
Our thoughts control our view of this world.
Robin Sharma said it best. “Everything is created twice; one in the mind and another in reality.”
Ask yourself, are you here today because of the conscious decisions you make in your life? When was the last time you look in the mirror and truly evaluate yourself?
What I mean is not embracing another set of make-believe, but rather take comfort that there is no such thing as identity and you are free to choose how to live your life, regardless of social expectations.
In life, we always portray ourselves as the lead actor and other supporting casts revolve around us, bringing in context and meaning to the entire movie.
But what if the roles are reversed and we are the supporting cast, filling up the scene for somebody else's movie? What if this is the reality?
Your need for others and others need for you
We are always a part of society. Be it at your workplace, your friendships, or your family. The main reason why we judge others is because we have yet to form a relationship with ourselves.
The equation is very simple. If you’re separate from your self, then you’re disconnected from others.
Sometimes we want to attract that person but we seem to be “out of sync”.
“Why doen’t she doesn’t return the favour?
“What does she mean when she said ‘nothing’? We love the same things and we I thought I know her well. I just don’t understand.”
I’m guilty of entertaining such thoughts. It finally dawned on me that energies of the same frequencies vibrate together.
You cannot do the tango with someone who prefers line dancing.
In life, we all need each other who matches with us. Like how I need you to read this post in order to send the message across.
It is just about finding our balance and live a true authentic self.
Tango out.
